The day I saw Jock's Nuts

I was out with my Biffs for an exciting night of dancing and drinking... at Bourbon, the usual Saturday night routine.

So we are listening to the cover band, dancing and having a good time, when I noticed Gary's friend Jock standing near us in his tight acid wash jeans and hi-top sneakers. So as I bust out some moves, I say to him (joke) "Aren't I an awesome dancer, my moves are awesome." He responds with (serious) "Yeah, but watch this." And proceeds to do the splits. Mind you, this is a grown man, who has just called me out on my dancing, with a dance off that included the splits.

I start laughing and sink down to the floor with my laughter... as I glance up, my view is met with an image of smooth skin, shoved through a hole in the acid wash jeans. After a moment, I realize they are, in fact, nuts. In his endeavor to perform the splits, Jock has split his pants from back to front... and had apparently decided that commando was the way to go for that evening.

His nuts were pushing through the hole, but as he stood, he is holding his rear. You see, Jock had realized the pants split, and didn't want us to see his behind, not realizing that we could see his family jewels. He stood with a group of laughing girls for approximately 3-5 minutes before someone had the decency to tell him that his nuts were protruding from his pants.